Thursday, February 26, 2009

Grammar Preface

There was a poll posted a few weeks ago regarding grammar & possession. The results are forthcoming, but here's a saved conversation from roughly 2 years ago. Oddly enough, Michelle is one of my closest friends. OMG, MUCH LUV GIRLIE!!!1

[for the sake of anonymity & functionality, Michelle's last name is Flanders]
here's the thing: when you're indicating possession by a singular noun ending in "s", you still have to write "'s". it looks wrong, but i promise you, it's grammatically correct.
examples:
james's shoes
h.g. wells's novel
michelle flanders's ghetto booty

i will fucking fight you about this issue, i'm not even kidding
Me: I hate you because of your away message.
Michelle: Haha. It's CORRECT.
Me: IF YOU QUOTE THAT GODDAMN STUPID BOOK ILL PUNCH YOU IN THE BABY MAKER!!!
Michelle: I feel like it's the exact same thing as someone saying "the sky isn't blue, it's brown". That's a completely incorrect statement, just like the statement "Michelle Flanders' boobs aren't breathtaking". Completely incorrect so I must argue.
Me: Yea, her boobs are saggy and boring. Snap.
Michelle: Also, "yeah" has an "h". Maybe you missed the memo. ::does a cakewalk::
Me: ...off a cliff.
Michelle: The apostrophe s is correct, so I suppose it matters not.
Me: You're vile. P.S. "Michelle Flanders' boobs aren't breathtaking". Nice putting the period in the WRONG place.
Michelle: I don't think you want to open THAT can of worms. Yes, that's right. Not kidding. I WOULD quote that goddamn stupid book, but... The putting the period or comma outside of the quotation marks is highly contended. I strongly feel that they belong OUTSIDE of the quotation marks; after all, I'm not quoting the punctuation. But that's more British frame of mind.
Me: YOU HATE AMERICA, TERRORIST!
Michelle: And yes, Lynne Truss of Eats, Shoots & Leaves fame would agree with me.
Me: She's. A. ::ponders actually using the word he hates:: ::does it:: Cunt.
Michelle: I prefer "C-U-Next-Tuesday".
Me: I do not.
Michelle: You wouldn't.
Me: Now that I'm full of hate & rage, I leave you.

2 comments:

Michelle said...

Probably my favorite part was that my last name was "Flanders."

(Note that I put the punctuation inside the quotation marks there! I've just made myself start doing that because most Americans don't realize that putting it outside of the quotation marks is also correct and makes more sense when you really think about it. I dream of a day when I can do that without fear of judgment or persecution!)

William said...

Figured it was practically your last name to begin with, so not much of a stretch.

I find it so weird that you want to hold fast to such British ways of thinking. You've always seemed like more of a "fuck other ways of doing things" kind girl.