Thursday, March 12, 2015

An Open Letter to Theatre Audiences

Dear audiences,

It's been many years since I attended weekly Mass. It's been a long time since a 'place of worship' held any personal sense of truth, belief, or higher power.

That being said, I treat my time in a theatre as the, for a lack of better word, 'holiest' part of my day. Sure, I wear work boots, jeans, and hoodies, but the time spent sitting & experiencing a show delivers me to that higher place. The respect & adoration for the people on that stage, below that stage, & behind that stage radiates out no matter what I'm wearing.

So if you're talking. During a performance. Or an overture. Or an entr'acte. I will ask you to stop. If you deem it necessary to argue back or retort, I will ask you again. There is in no possible way you're in the right, so I will not back down or be kind about it.

If you were sitting around me when I couldn't take any more chatting during FIRST WIVES CLUB last night, I apologize for nothing. We pay money to respectfully appreciate everyone's hard work on & around that stage. We work hard so everyone sitting in our audiences gets their time & money's worth.

It's our holy place, so for the love of everything sacred - shut it.

Stepping off a soapbox after preaching to the choir,
William

Monday, March 09, 2015

Dzhokhar Tsarnaev: Guilty as Hell

In this courtroom sketch, Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, center, is depicted between defense attorneys Miriam Conrad, left, and Judy Clarke, right, during his federal death penalty trial, Thursday, March 5, 2015, in Boston. Tsarnaev is charged with conspiring with his brother to place two bombs near the Boston Marathon finish line in April 2013, killing three and injuring 260 people. (AP Photo/Jane Flavell Collins)

Thursday, January 22, 2015

Warm Up with SPIKE HEELS

SPIKE HEELS opens tomorrow night! We crashed a rehearsal to chat with the cast and director about their roles, Theresa Rebeck's writing, and why you should come see it.



SPIKE HEELS runs January 23–February 8, 2015 at THE WEST STAGE AT THE RAVEN THEATRE COMPLEX. Thursdays–Saturdays @ 8 PM and Sundays @ 3:30 PM. Tickets are available at http://spikeheelschi.bpt.me.

Tuesday, January 06, 2015

#Chiberia2015

Aaaaand here's how I Snapchat on pain meds. Root canals are no fun. Floss your teeth, y'all.


Thursday, December 04, 2014

A Classic Holiday Wish

Steve Martin: If I had one wish that I could wish this holiday season, it would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace.

If I had two wishes that I could wish for this holiday season, the first would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing in the spirit of harmony and peace.. and the second would be for $30 million a month to be given to me, tax-free in a Swiss bank account.

You know, if I had three wishes that I could make this holiday season, first, of course, would be for all the children to get together and sing.. the second would be for the $30 million every month to me.. and the third would be for all encompassing power over every living being thing in the entire universe.

And if I had four wishes that I could make this holiday season, first would be the crap about the kids.. second would be for the $30 million.. the third would be for all the power.. and the fourth would be to set aside one month each year for an extended 31-day orgasm, to be brought about slowly by Rosanna Arquette and that model Paulina somebody, I can't think of her name, of course my lovely wife could come, too. She's behind me 100% on this, I guarantee you.

Wait a minute, maybe that sex thing should be the first wish! So, if I made that the first wish, because, you know, it could all go boom tomorrow, and then what have you got? No, no.. the kids singing would be great, that would be nice. No, no, who am I kidding! I mean, theyu're not gonna be able to get all those kids together! I mean, the logistics of the thing is impossible! It's mroe trouble than it's worth! So, we reorganize: here we go. First, the sex - we go with that; second, the money. No! We go with the power second, then the money, and then the kids. Oh, wait, oh geez! I forgot about revenge against my enemies! Okay.. revenge against all my enemies, they should die like pigs in Hell! That would be the fourth wish! And of course, my fifth wish would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing in the spirit of peace and harmony. Thank you, everybody.

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Brown Paper Box Co. has 4 BroadwayWorld.com Award Nominations!

Voting has opened for the 2014 BroadwayWorld Chicago Regional Awards, and we've been nominated for in 4 categories! Thank you all so much for your support in getting us nominated, but we need your help in winning one of the titles. Here are our nominations:


Voting will continue until December 31, 2014 and winners will be announced shortly after that. Thanks again!

Thursday, November 06, 2014